Some time ago, my mom's cousin began researching our family history. While we knew we were of Norwegian, Swedish, Danish and Finnish descent on that side of the family, turns out we are also a little bit German.
My cousin has been able to trace the Danes and Germans back to the mid-1800s and it is all very fascinating. Our family tree is really coming together. Additionally, we know many of their birth dates, when they were married, their occupations and when they came over to America. Just the names themselves are so interesting. Hermine Friedericke Catharine Mansen was my great-great-great grandmother (I think that was the correct number of 'greats'). Hermine's son, Robert Thoede, my great-great grandfather, later helped build the stairs in the Statue of Liberty.
We even know what boats some of them came over on. Some of the members of the Thoede side of our family came over on the Wieland ship, which left Hamburg, Germany in 1882 arriving in New York some weeks later. When my other great-grandfather's family came from Norway to the US on the ship Furnessia in 1911, those checking them in at Ellis Island changed the spelling of their last name from Henriksen to Hendricksen.
Now that we have gone over a little of my family background on my mother's side, I also have to share with you what my family affectionately calls 'Brooklyn-Norwegian.' Many of you know that my Nana, my mother's mom, coined many, many great terms and sayings during her life (cement underwear, anyone?). She was truly one of the funniest people I have ever known. But the true originator of crazy terms was actually her mother, who was Norwegian and Danish. I'm beginning to realize I come from a long line of pushy broads. My great-grandmother passed away before I was born so I never got to meet her, but her legacy lives on because we all still use her vocabulary.
My great-grandmother coined these words that sounded like they were Norwegian and they all have their own distinct meanings. My grandmother and her siblings grew up using these words and most of us in the family still use them to this day. The best part is that when my mom married my dad - who is born and raised in Norway - she told him: "Oh, I know some words in Norwegian!" My father looked at her incredulously and let her know he had no idea what she was talking about. Those weren't Norwegian words. Turned out, my great-grandmother just made them up. Which is when the realization occurred...they are Brooklyn-Norwegian.
So, because I think they are hilarious and I use them quite often - so much so that many of them are now part of Ralph's vocabulary - I have decided to share them with you. Feel free to use them. Spread them around. My great-grandmother would be so proud! Please note that I'm not exactly sure how to spell them. And they should be pronounced with a Norwegian accent. I can teach you that at a later time. Likely over drinks. Please also keep in mind some are a bit vulgar. We don't hold anything back in my family.
Fnugg - a piece of lint or fuzz
Kliss - useless knick-knacks that simply take up space around your house, f.ex a shell you bought in the islands that someone wrote 'Bahamas' on with a Sharpie
Smat (or smatting) - chewing with your mouth open and making a noise while doing it
Smattehase - someone who continuously chews with their mouth open
Knasing - chewing something crunchy with your mouth open (my family cannot stand knasing. When I was a kid, they used to make me eat ice cream cones outside or in a separate room because they couldn't stand the knasing. God forbid you try to eat chips with one of them in the car while on a road trip. Also, Funions make the worst knasig. It's like nails on a chalkboard)
Kroka (I really don't know how to spell this one, I'll have to pronounce it for you in person) - female parts aka va-jay-jay
Dingsen - male part, the 'twig' of the 'twig and berries'
Musta - the female monthly curse, i.e. 'I have my musta'
I expect these to be used next time I see one of you. There will be a quiz! And I hope you got a good laugh!
Thursday, April 11, 2013
Sunday, April 7, 2013
A Pushy Broad Leans In
Some of you may remember I did an entry about Sheryl Sandberg and her ideas on women in the workplace last Fall on my other blog. Recently she has been all over the news and various media outlets promoting her new book, 'Lean In: Women, Work, and the Will to Lead.' I just finished the book myself and it had quite an impact on me.
When I was in college and first starting out in my career, I used to think that women had to act just like men to be be successful and get ahead. There is a book called 'Nice Girls Don't Get The Corner Office 101: Unconscious Mistakes Women Make That Sabotage Their Careers,' which basically tells you all the things you should not do as a female in the workplace. Don't bake cookies for the office, don't cry at work, don't sit with your leg tucked under you, etc. To be honest, the book makes a lot of valid points. However, I realized after reading Sheryl's book that a woman's place in the office doesn't necessarily have to be that rigid. Women are different and that's okay. It's okay if we get emotional. I've cried at work before and while it's not something I want to do on a regular basis, it happened and then I moved on from it. But we all have to lean in and understand that while men and women communicate differently, it doesn't make women any less effective as leaders. In fact, in many instances it probably makes us better.
While reading 'Lean In,' I found myself highlighting passages I wanted to remember, I was yelling 'yes!' in agreement out loud to no in particular and I have been talking about it to anyone who will listen. Sheryl's three main ideas are:
Sit at the table. Be an active participant. Keep your hand raised. Don't sit on the sidelines. Did you know that if there is a job opening, a woman will generally only put in for it if she feels she has 100% of the skills needed? A man will apply if he feels he has 60% of the skills needed. The problem is that this by doing this, we hold ourselves back because so many of the job skills needed are often acquired on the job. Pushy broads know this and are confident in their abilities to take on new tasks.
Make your partner an equal partner. Ladies, you absolutely can have a successful career and a family. But, while women have become much more active in the workplace, we still do the majority of the housework. Women must have the conversations with their partners, letting them know that if they are both going to work full time, the housework must be shared equally. And I fully admit that this is something Ralph and I have to work on, too. Especially when we have children.
Nora Ephron said: "It will be a little messy, but embrace the mess. It will be complicated, but rejoice in the complications. It will not be anything like what you think it will be like, but surprises are good for you. And don't be frightened: you can always change your mind. I know: I've had four careers and three husbands."
Don't leave before you leave. Women often start preparing to begin a family years before it actually happens. They sometimes pass up job opportunities because they think they might have children soon. But in doing so, women hold themselves back and it becomes a self-fulfilling prophecy. Take the opportunities now, because it will put you in a better position financially to handle family life later. Don't worry about whether or not you'll be able to juggle it all. When that time comes, you'll figure it out. Women always do.
I was in St. Louis last week at our corporate office for a Diversity Team meeting, which I'm part of for my division, Fleet Management. Having just read 'Lean In' and feeling very fired up about it, I asked to make it a part of our agenda and I presented the ideas to our team and our corporate leaders. I was delighted to find that they took to it even stronger than I expected them to. Having a discussion like this in a room filled with mostly men - there were only three women there, including myself - was interesting in that they often don't realize that we have these thoughts and that we worry about these things. While many of them know they have fantastic women working for them - strong salespeople and strong leaders - some of those women might need a little push occasionally in order to pursue that bigger opportunity.
As a result of the Diversity Team meeting, we are going to be starting Lean In Circles for our female Fleet Management salespeople and managers around the country and I have been tasked with making that happen. Lean In Circles are groups of women coming together to discuss different topics and also support each other in their success. More info about it is on the website www.leanin.org. Depending on how our company Circles go and if they take off, I'm considering starting one for friends I have outside of Enterprise here in Orlando. I feel very, very strongly about a woman's ability to lead and be successful in the workplace. It's imperative that we support each other and continue to lean in to our careers. So - after reading this, hopefully I have inspired you to pick up Sheryl Sandberg's book. I really think you will like it. I'm leaning in to my career...are you?
When I was in college and first starting out in my career, I used to think that women had to act just like men to be be successful and get ahead. There is a book called 'Nice Girls Don't Get The Corner Office 101: Unconscious Mistakes Women Make That Sabotage Their Careers,' which basically tells you all the things you should not do as a female in the workplace. Don't bake cookies for the office, don't cry at work, don't sit with your leg tucked under you, etc. To be honest, the book makes a lot of valid points. However, I realized after reading Sheryl's book that a woman's place in the office doesn't necessarily have to be that rigid. Women are different and that's okay. It's okay if we get emotional. I've cried at work before and while it's not something I want to do on a regular basis, it happened and then I moved on from it. But we all have to lean in and understand that while men and women communicate differently, it doesn't make women any less effective as leaders. In fact, in many instances it probably makes us better.
While reading 'Lean In,' I found myself highlighting passages I wanted to remember, I was yelling 'yes!' in agreement out loud to no in particular and I have been talking about it to anyone who will listen. Sheryl's three main ideas are:
Sit at the table. Be an active participant. Keep your hand raised. Don't sit on the sidelines. Did you know that if there is a job opening, a woman will generally only put in for it if she feels she has 100% of the skills needed? A man will apply if he feels he has 60% of the skills needed. The problem is that this by doing this, we hold ourselves back because so many of the job skills needed are often acquired on the job. Pushy broads know this and are confident in their abilities to take on new tasks.
Make your partner an equal partner. Ladies, you absolutely can have a successful career and a family. But, while women have become much more active in the workplace, we still do the majority of the housework. Women must have the conversations with their partners, letting them know that if they are both going to work full time, the housework must be shared equally. And I fully admit that this is something Ralph and I have to work on, too. Especially when we have children.
Nora Ephron said: "It will be a little messy, but embrace the mess. It will be complicated, but rejoice in the complications. It will not be anything like what you think it will be like, but surprises are good for you. And don't be frightened: you can always change your mind. I know: I've had four careers and three husbands."
Don't leave before you leave. Women often start preparing to begin a family years before it actually happens. They sometimes pass up job opportunities because they think they might have children soon. But in doing so, women hold themselves back and it becomes a self-fulfilling prophecy. Take the opportunities now, because it will put you in a better position financially to handle family life later. Don't worry about whether or not you'll be able to juggle it all. When that time comes, you'll figure it out. Women always do.
I was in St. Louis last week at our corporate office for a Diversity Team meeting, which I'm part of for my division, Fleet Management. Having just read 'Lean In' and feeling very fired up about it, I asked to make it a part of our agenda and I presented the ideas to our team and our corporate leaders. I was delighted to find that they took to it even stronger than I expected them to. Having a discussion like this in a room filled with mostly men - there were only three women there, including myself - was interesting in that they often don't realize that we have these thoughts and that we worry about these things. While many of them know they have fantastic women working for them - strong salespeople and strong leaders - some of those women might need a little push occasionally in order to pursue that bigger opportunity.
As a result of the Diversity Team meeting, we are going to be starting Lean In Circles for our female Fleet Management salespeople and managers around the country and I have been tasked with making that happen. Lean In Circles are groups of women coming together to discuss different topics and also support each other in their success. More info about it is on the website www.leanin.org. Depending on how our company Circles go and if they take off, I'm considering starting one for friends I have outside of Enterprise here in Orlando. I feel very, very strongly about a woman's ability to lead and be successful in the workplace. It's imperative that we support each other and continue to lean in to our careers. So - after reading this, hopefully I have inspired you to pick up Sheryl Sandberg's book. I really think you will like it. I'm leaning in to my career...are you?
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